a bit of carolina in vermont

Some friends fit so seamlessly into your life. We marvel how it is so with the Jordans. Has been since we met them on the front steps of our apartment building in San Francisco. Was when we moved in with them when Melissa was pregnant with Everly. Was this way when we lived within arm's reach in North Carolina. Continues to be, with three children between us and only the biannual visits to sustain us. Nick and I to the relative warmth of Raleigh to escape the Vermont winter and they to the relative cool of Vermont to escape the Carolina summer.

This trip;

Melissa cooked us every breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
Brent worked invaluable days with Nick on the construction of the new barn.
Everly took it upon herself to close in the mama hen at night and open them up in the morning.
Arlo spent most of his days playing on our '77 VW bus, or on the tractor.

We all dreamt of the summers ahead as the kids get older and as we get thinner and more good looking...and also older.

In the post-college, post-San Francisco world that we live in, the friends we made when we were young, whom we love so deeply are scattered around the globe. Now we are settled in a new town far away from most of our beloveds. Here, we are beginning the awkward dance of two adults trying to make new friends in a town where everyone has known everyone since grade school. We are not making great strides. They will come. We have a lifetime to work on them. In the meantime it is so comforting and renewing to have visits from families like the Jordans. To be reassured that no matter the distance between us, we will forever be good friends.


  1. I follow both your blog and Dear Baby and didnt know the connection until last week when she posted that she was off in Vermont. That is so fun! Sounds like you guys had a great time!

  2. So precious for you to all have these lasting connections. I can appreciate what you're saying so much now that we are living on the other side of the country from everyone we know and love, in a small town, expecting our first child! I'm going to treasure the visits that are happening soon and be grateful for the connections that are sustained over distance and time. Oh, and cooking every meal for you - what a gem. Glad you had such a wonderful time together.

  3. Oh, how I relate to the struggles of fitting into a community of folk whose feet have never ventured far from home.

    I was a military child, left home at 17 and was a total transient for another eight years. I ended up settling in Vancouver, BC for 25 yrs, then a life style change brought us to our old farmhouse in rural East Coast (New Brunswick). It's a bilingual province, us in a tiny French village but all know English. They are Acadian with a rich history, having been expelled from their land by the British in the 1700s. Many perished at sea. They eventually made their way back to their land, fought hard to preserve their culture and their language (a very old dialect dating back to the 1600s). It's a different place, that's for sure.

    Both my husband and I are of Acadian descent. We are Anglophones, though, with French names and we don't fit in. As much as the locals are warm and friendly, they stick to themselves for the most part. I'm OK with it, though.

    It's a gift to have treasured friends like yours.

  4. We're just about to move to North Wales, an English girl and a Scotsman ending our days in our forever home on a Welsh hillside. I hope we can fit into the local village as well as we have managed to merge ourselves into the last few places we have lived in. Sometimes it can take time but it's always worth it.

  5. And then I cried at my desk in the middle of a Tuesday. Wiping the tears away furiously as I eye the clock and realized I have just a few minutes to get myself together before an afternoon meeting. Our time with you, remains among my most treasured hours. Missing everything about you, and dopey Hawkeye, and sweet Leland's little hawk call, and Nick's exuberant praise of my sub part cooking. What a gift it is to know you, Kate.


  6. This is a lovely post. I like reading about other twenty-somethings struggles to make friends in the "new world" of adulthood. It lets me know I'm not alone in it. It is very comforting to spend time with gems of old friends. Keep writing- I love reading what you have to say.


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